Performing Gigs
by Bruce Holmes

Putting On a Great Show
How do you get up on stage and look like you belong there.  Like you’re a pro bound for great things.  This is tougher than you think it’s going to be.  How to be charming but not silly.  How to be entertaining without embarrassing yourself.  It’s real easy when goofing with the audience to sound ill-at-ease.  In my time I’ve erred on the side of silly.  I’m still working at just letting my music do the talking.  Sometimes less is better.

Most of the time I make a point of saying something about a song as I get to it, not because I want to explain the song, but because I want to peak their interest.  I want them curious about the song as I begin so they’re really listening.  Then it’s up to the song to hold their interest.  But the introductions should be short.  I think it sounds incredibly amateur to announce, “This is a song I wrote.”  You can get the same idea across without hitting them over the head with it.

Plan everything.  Do you have a quick joke you can tell as you put on a capo?  Spontaneity is wonderful, but if you plan to introduce a song, script it.  Know exactly what you’re going to say and practice saying it calmly and simply.  You’re allowed to stray from the script.  But at least have it as the foundation for your behavior on stage.

Include humor.  The perfect way to do this is a short, funny story that introduces a song.  But don’t be too proud to tell a joke.  I picked up some humor anthologies and picked out a couple dozen one-line jokes that I thought were funny.  I toss them off at odd moments: tuning, or changing picks, or putting on a capo.

Never do a song in public that you haven’t sung a hundred times in private.  My problem is that when I’ve just finished a new song, that’s the one I’m in love with and that’s the one I want to play for people.  And if I rush it out to the public, I’m going to screw it up.  Guaranteed.  We all have some degree of stage fright.  Singing in front of an audience is a distraction.  You will not do as well as when you were singing in your living room.  You need to have practiced a song enough so it’s on automatic.  A month from now after singing it three times a day, every day, it’ll be ready.  Even while knowing better, I find this bit of advice easy to ignore.  It always seems as if the new one is so much better than the ones that have come before that I can’t stand the idea of playing one of the old relics.  Trust me, one of your old relics played well will trump the new jewel played badly.  This is especially true for open mic nights if you’re trying to find fans.  Do not play the new song and trust that they’ll forgive the mistakes and see it for what it will be.  Impress them with what you can do well.  I find this to be the most difficult rule to follow in my own career.  I just want to play the new song so badly that I kid myself into thinking it’s ready when it’s not.  If you can’t play a song perfectly every time you practice it, you are not ready to play it in public.  Be a pro.  Pros don’t get up in front of a crowd and have a meltdown.  Have you noticed that?  Don’t play a song you’re not able to play impeccably and then feel like you need to apologize.  That makes you an amateur.

Know What’s Expected of You
Before I can begin planning my set, I’d better be absolutely clear about what is expected of me.  How many sets does the venue operator want you to play?  How long?  When does he expect you to start and finish?

Also be sure you’re clear about the financial arrangements.  Are you going to get paid?  How much?  Ideally these things should be written out.  Not because people don’t trust one another, but so there won’t be a misunderstanding.

Your Goal When Performing
First and foremost you want people to have a good time.  You want them to leave happy, glad they expended the money and time to go see you.  Along the way you want to thrill them with music, get them to laugh, touch their heart, and give them something to think about.  You want to be an entertaining person to spend time with.

Ask yourself why people go out to hear a concert?  And really give it some thought.  For the music?  Well, yes and no.  The music is the lynchpin of it all, but they can stay home and listen to music.  Why hear it live?  Better sound quality?  Usually the quality on a CD is far better than what you hear live.  It has to do with being entertained.  Do they get to cry or laugh or sing along or just plain have a good time?  It’s up to you to create that.  You are trying to create a connection of the heart between yourself and your audience.  (I mean, isn’t that why you’re in the business.  It sure ain’t the money.)  Tell a few stories about your own life.  Make ‘em laugh, make ‘em cry.  A few small moments of wisdom are appreciated.  How about something they can sing along on?  Let them be part of the show.  Be an entertainer.  If you can dance, do it.  If you can juggle, find a way to sneak that in there.

Have you got some funny songs?  If you don’t maybe it’s time to write one.  People are there to have a good time.  I one day decided to write something humorous.  I never truly loved the song that resulted the way I loved some of my more artistic masterpieces.  But that one comedy song has done more for my career than all of the artistic mood-pieces put together.  The only proviso is, you must not look like you’re trying too hard to be funny.  A song that tries to be funny and isn’t, is a disaster.  Once you’ve written your comedy hit, try it out a couple of times.  If people aren’t laughing out loud, drop it.  It’s not funny.  Try again.  Seems to me the sad songs are easier to write, but you need variety.  Write some songs that are just plain fun.

Also consider a sing-along or two.  You want to get the crowd on your side.  You want them having fun and liking you.  A fun sing-along will do wonders for your set.  Some sing-alongs are harder than others.  Start with one that’s really easy to get.  When a song is too hard to learn, people can shut down.  So do the easy one, get them in the mood, and then tackle the one where they actually have to remember how the song goes.

Your Set List
Choose your songs wisely.  I have a song that I think is absolutely smashing.  But it’s very dense, a lot of words, nothing remarkable about the hook.  I don’t think of it as a great song for live performances.  Some songs are more accessible than others.  If you put together a set of slow, serious deeply-meaningful songs, I can guarantee disaster.  You need more fast than slow, more fun than serious.  Organize your sets so that each song will seem different from the one before.  If you have two slow, sad waltzes in the key of D, you do not want them back to back in your set list.  The best way to avoid boredom is with variety.  I tend to lean toward fast or humorous songs in a live show.  Songs where the audience can participate are priceless.

The most important decisions are how you begin and how you end.  I start with something fast, impressive and popular.  It’s their first experience of me, and by the end of the first chorus they will have gotten excited about the show or given up on me and decided they shouldn’t have shown up.  I also choose a first song that isn’t terribly difficult to play.  I want my stage gitters behind me before I tackle the tough stuff.  And finally, I don’t want a song that requires an introduction.  I want to walk out there and start playing.

The second song may be almost as important as the first.  If you’ve succeeded with the first song, you now have a chance to seal the deal.  By now they’re really listening.  I sometimes choose a slower song that will really grab their heart.  If the second song is a winner, you’ve now won their trust and they’ve stopped worrying about whether this is going to be a waste of time.  Then it’s time to make ‘em laugh.

But before I get into figuring out the rest of the concert, I’ll often decide how I’m going to finish.  What is it you want them to leave with?  I like to end on a quiet note.  Give them something to think about.  If you’ve got a song that sums up your philosophy of life, this might be a good place to use it.  Or do I save that for the encore?  Depends on whether there’s time for an encore.  If you’re doing a show with other people and all you’ve got is a half hour, don’t plan on one.  Just do your show and let the next person get on stage.  But the only difference in your plan is whether you walk off the stage between your last two songs.  The point being that the second to last song had better be a doozey.  Pull out all the stops, show them what you’ve got.  That may be the song that decides whether you get asked back for an encore.  It doesn’t hurt to have one extra song in your pocket.  You’re not planning on doing it.  But if they insist on a second encore, you’re not standing there with your mind a blank.  Once I’ve sort of bookended the show, I work on the middle, trying to create variety.

Doing the two songs in the same key back to back is less than ideal.The index cards help enormously in this arranging process.  I can see if I’ve got two song in the same key back to back.  When I’ve got a sequence I like I put it on a single sheet of paper.  Along with the songs, I list such things as introductions, jokes, and capo changes.  It is so easy to forget such things when you’re on stage.  If you start a song and the capo is sitting in the wrong spot because of the previous song, it’s a train-wreck and you look inept.

You don’t always have to say something before a song.  Sometimes it’s very energizing to suddenly launch into an up-tempo song after a slower piece.  If the songs you sing are the bones of your act, the comments you make between songs are the flesh.  It’s where you get to share who you are.  I know the songs do that, but the songs don’t require you to get naked to do so.  They act as a sort of shield.  But an anecdote about your life, especially one with a little humor and self-deprecation will allow them to love you as a person.  Try and be interesting.  Is there something about that day in history that applies to one of the songs?  Is there some theme you can weave into the performance?

Think of your whole set as monolog, mixing personal angst, interesting facts, observations and insights on the nature of life.  It’s like a good conversation.  If I haven’t got something to say about a song, I’ll tend to throw in a joke.  I’ve chosen short, simple, throw-away jokes instead of something long and involved.  I don’t want to present myself as a comic who’s working at making them laugh.  They’re just stray pieces of humor that happen to come out as I’m putting on the capo or whatnot.  Of course, all this is planned out on my set list sheet.  But they don’t know that.

If you’ve got more than one set to play adjust accordingly.  The final song before the break needs to be one of your best.  Ideally something that’s fun.

Your Appearance on Stage
Have you noticed that most of the people who make it in the music industry are better looking than average?  Do you think that’s an accident?  People who can’t manage a certain overall level of attractiveness tend to work behind the scenes.  They may sing even better than the star, and maybe they sang harmonies on the star’s album.  But they probably won’t ever be offered a contract with some serious money behind it.  It’s just human nature.  People like nice packaging.  Cursing that reality doesn’t change it.  So face up to it and resolve to do everything you can with what you’ve been given.  The item that’s easiest to change is your haircut.  Does it really work for you.  Your opinion is not useful.  Ask your friends for feedback.  If your hairstyle doesn’t work, they’ll be so relieved to finally get the chance to say so.

Have a look.  I wear form fitting blue jeans and a t-shirt.  Yes I realize I’m old enough to be some people’s grandfather, but I keep in shape and I’m flaunting it.  The jeans are not just any jeans.  I would never have imagined spending $150 for a pair of jeans, but I’ve now gone and done it.  I always wear the same color t-shirt.  I want to stick in people’s memory.  I want to be recognizable.  I think a consistent look supports that.  The shoes or boots you wear are a chance to make a statement.

If the look can have some element of the exotic to it, all the better.  It seems to me the higher up the food chain you manage to get, the more exotic you can make the look.  If you’re just doing open mics, exotic might look mostly foolish.  But if you’re a name and drawing crowds, something which makes you seem a little special and different can be helpful.  I know there have been entire movements rejecting this notion lately.  Your decision.  But at least give it some thought.

How You Sound
How are your strings?  If you play guitar, your strings will degrade in time.  They’ll lose their spark.  If it’s been more than a couple of weeks since you changed strings and you’ve got an important gig, put on new strings.  I usually do this the day before so they won’t be stretching out as I perform.

Do a sound check.  If you’re the featured performer, this is pretty standard.  If you’re doing an open mike, it’s not so easy.  But if you’re around when the sound system is being set up you can offer to help by playing as the host diddles the dials.  They’re not going to design their mix around your needs, but you’ll have the chance to get used to singing through that system.  It helps.  Every location is a little different and takes getting used to.  Not getting the echo and the monitors sorted out until you’ve finished your two songs is a bummer.

My standard request of the sound person is to go easy on the guitar.  Guitars tend to be mixed quite loud and then you can’t hear the words.  You’ll have to judge this for yourself.  Which acts do you enjoy the most?  Why can you understand some songs and not others?  It seems to me the most common culprit is a too loud guitar.
Tune up before you go on stage.  Walking up there and beginning to tune is just so insane that I can’t imagine it needs to be discussed.  And yet I’ve seen people doing it.  What were they thinking?

If you use a pick have a spare in your pocket or somewhere handy.  I once managed to toss my pick into the soundhole.  You can imagine how cool it looked with me up in front of the crowd trying to shake it out.  Eventually someone took pity on me and lent me a pick.  But it wasn’t the pick I was used to and, frankly, I played badly.  Carry a spare.
I could also recommend stuff like a spare set of strings so you’ll be OK if one breaks. But the reality is you might be better off borrowing someone else’s guitar.  Taking the time out to replace a string is not always an option.  And if you do replace a string you’ll have to deal with the initial stretching that occurs.  You may find yourself trying to tune up that string in mid-song.  Despite these concerns, I do carry a spare set of strings.  But that’s my final solution, not my first.

You must not complain that your guitar doesn’t sound right.  (A word to the soundman in the beginning, fine.  But then make the best of it and play.)

Audience Contact
You want a combination of mystique and intimacy.  People want you to be someone special.  They also want to be allowed into your world.  Most performers avoid hanging out with the crowd before the show.  They don’t mingle.  They don’t want to seem like an average joe before they go onstage.  Keep out of site if you can.  Get ready to play in private.  But then, after the show, you want intimacy.  Let people connect with you.  Hang around, talk to them.  Let them thank you for the show.  If someone compliments you, be gracious and just say thank you.  Don’t tell them how badly you really did.  That just refutes their opinion.  While you’re at it, collect names and addresses.  Get to know people.  Sign autographs.  Whatever.  You’ll meet some wonderful folks and these people may turn into your fan base.  At the end of the show you need to be humble and available.  In my own case, the brain cells that handle remembering names is just plain missing.  But it’s important, so I work at it.  I have a little digital camera I take with me.  I take pictures and add them to my database.  That way I can review before a show the names of the people who might show up.

Getting to the Show
Be there early.  The farther away you are and the more possible problems lie in wait between you and the venue, the more leeway you need.  At bare minimum, be there a half hour early.  An hour early is even better.  Do you have any idea how hard it is on a venue operator if people have shown up to hear a show, and it’s time to start, and the act hasn’t shown up yet?  Don’t ever put anyone through that, because if you do, you won’t be asked back.

Make sure you’ve done what you can to make your stomach happy during the show.  Whether that means not eating too much, or eating enough will depend on your nature.  Don’t eat something that’s going to coat your throat with thick phlegm.

Drinking and Drugs
In the entertainment industry there are plenty of stories of performers high on this or that or drunk while performing.  Yes, you can do these things.  But do you really think you’ll give a great performance?  Maybe you’ll get through it with only minor sloppiness, but that’s not much of an accomplishment.  The problem here is perception.  If you’re drunk and you play poorly, you won’t know it and you won’t much care.  If you’re sober and make a few mistakes due to nerves, you’ll know it and you’ll care.  So why not get drunk before the show so you won’t have to deal with the stage fright.  Trouble is, I don’t think you’ll play better drunk.  I think you’ll stink, but you’ll think you did fine.  (No you can’t have that line as a song lyric, I’m going to use it.)

During the Show
Have someone introduce you.  They don’t have to say much.  In fact, if they get too effusive it will sound false.  But an introduction brings the curtain up on your performance

Be positive, not negative.  Don’t complain about anything.  People didn’t come to hear you complain.  Don’t put anyone down.  The world doesn’t need it.

Never apologize.

Never lower expectations.  Don’t talk about how nervous you are and how you’ll probably botch it.  Don’t say this is a new song and you’ll probably make a mess of it.

Don’t announce humor.  A funny song should be self-evident.

Your song set-up should not be a recap of the song.

Grab a sip of water as often as possible.  You don’t want to dry out your vocal chords.

Be self confident without being arrogant.

Don’t be political unless you’re willing to limit your audience to those who agree with your beliefs.  There are certain venues where taking a stand is appropriate.  But often people pay money to hear your music with an implicit understanding that you won’t spend the time insulting their beliefs.  There are certain issues where I’m willing to take a stand.  But on issues where good people can disagree, I’m not determined to win converts to my views.

Let go of your mistakes.  Just leave them behind.  Striving for perfection is what you do when you’re preparing.  When performing get humble.  You’re going to make some mistakes.  When they happen, you don’t dwell on them.  If your head stays stuck with a mistake, you’ll make a dozen more before the song’s over.
           
Playing Flawlessly
This is your goal, to be able to play your songs note-perfect, both the singing and the accompanyment, without fail.  And in a second I’ll talk about stagefright.  But forget stagefright.  It’s an excuse for not playing well.  Everyone has it and some play better than others.  For a while in the beginning I was always disappointed in my performances, “Gee, I played it fine at home.”  Big sigh.  Then a couple of things dawned on me.  No, I didn’t play it fine at home.  I just glossed over the mistakes because they didn’t feel so bad with no one listening.  And yes, once in a blue moon at home I had played it without a mistake.  But nine times out of ten I hadn’t.  Do you suppose you’re going to play the one out of ten good version once you’re in front of a crowd and the adrenaline’s flowing, playing havoc with your fine motor controls.  It doesn’t work that way.  For a while I told myself it wasn’t in me to play flawlessly.  I was too old or something; I just didn’t have that precise a brain.  All hogwash.

You will play something flawlessly if you’ve practiced it until it’s part of you, imprinted in every corner of your nervous system.  Once again it all comes down to hard work.  Practice, practice, practice.  And expect perfection of yourself as you do it.  This is the secret.  This is the only secret.  You won’t believe me until you prove it for yourself.  But I’m here to tell you, it works.

I have a new song.  I would like to play it tonight.  I’ve been playing it ten times a day for the last week.  My goal is to play it thirty times through today.  And the one lead that’s likely to trip me up I expect to play a couple hundred times.  I’ve taken the lead apart and grouped it into smaller segments and played them over and over.  Then gone back to the lead as a whole.  I’ve played those notes over and over, faster than I’ll do it on stage, again and again.  I hope to do it well tonight, but it’s still a close call.  It’s possible that when the adrenaline starts pumping I’ll find I wasn’t ready after all.  You have got to imbed it deep in your nervous system to be able to pull it off in public.  How hard are you willing to work at this?

OK, quiz time.  Our theme here is to be thoroughly prepared.  So let’s just say you buy a volume peddle so you can jack up the volume on the leads.  Three days later you want to perform at an important open mike.  Should you use the volume peddle at the open mike?  Answer is?  Let’s do this all together,  “ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR MIND!”  Well, I did.  So I start my first song and realize I don’t have my foot actually on the peddle.  So I’ve now got to place my foot on the peddle while playing a complex song.  I’ve got to balance on one foot and find the peddle and…  Train wreck.  I manage one mistake after another.  Total meltdown.  Actually no, I manage to keep singing and I finished the song.  But, really bad.  And the joke is the volume peddle never worked and they had to use the guitar mike instead.  You have to recreate stage conditions in every way, practice performing until your completely comfortable and can nail it every time.

Stage Fright
Sing in public as often as possible.  For most people the stage fright eases with experience.  So how do you get experience when you’re not good enough to get a gig?  Simple, work for free.  Find a coffee shop or a restaurant or some public place that will let you work for free.  You don’t even need a mike.  (For the small rooms us amateurs usually play, all these mikes we use are largely unnecessary and often detract from the sound quality.)  You can be a fly on the wall.  Find some nice business owner who’ll let you sing once or twice a week during lunch.  You go there, you find a comfortable corner, you sing your songs.  Sometimes someone will listen.  But you’ll get used to playing in public.  It will become old hat.  Maybe you’ll develop a few fans over time.  You need to practice every day anyway, right?  Once or twice a week do it in public.
Primarily, stage fright is an overabundance of adrenaline from all the excitement and terror of performing.  Adrenaline is great if you’re running away from a mastodon.  It does not help if you’re trying to play an instrument.  It plays havoc with fine motor control.  I’ve read that you can burn off some of that adrenaline by getting some exercise: run around the block, do some jumping jacks.  I realize, this isn’t always possible, but if you ever get the chance, see if it helps.

Since there is a chemical reason for stage fright it shouldn’t be too surprising that there is a chemical solution.  Beta blockers block the bodies reaction to adrenaline.  I’ve read that bananas contain a natural beta blocker.  I’ve used them for that purpose and I thought they helped, but I also detected a change for the worse in the clarity of my singing after eating a banana.  No one said there were easy solutions.    The beta-blocking drug propranolol (available as Inderal in the US) is fairly safe except for asthmatics and people with heart conditions.  If used consistently, it can also have a side affect of lowering libido.  Ooops.  You should definitely have a serious talk with your doctor before going this route.

There are all sorts of tidbits of advice.  The classic one is to imagine everyone in the audience in their underwear.  If that works for you, go for it.  In my experience, the audience is on your side.  They want you to succeed.  They understand that we’re not perfect and they overlook mistakes.  Maybe more to the point, they don’t pick up on half of our glitches.  They don’t know your song by heart, so if you sing the wrong line, how are they to know?  Even if you do something that seems obviously discordant to you, like a wrong chord, they still won’t be certain you screwed up.  UNLESS, of course, you telegraph the mistake and apologize.  But maybe you wanted a discordant note there.  They’re not keeping score.  Don’t apologize for your mistakes.  Don’t grimace.  Don’t focus they’re attention on how bad you feel about your sins.  They didn’t come hoping to watch someone have a tragedy in front of them.  They don’t want your apology.  THEY DON’T WANT TO WATCH YOU FEEL BAD ABOUT YOUR MISTAKE.  Because that makes them feel bad for you.  They’re there to have fun.  Act like you meant to do it, recover quickly and move on.

Some of this has to do with ego.  If you’re performing so that others will admire you, it’s easier to get uptight.  If you’re focused on the music and it’s value, you may find the pressure eases.

I used to screw up my guitar leads on a pretty reliable basis.  I noticed I sort of approached the moment with a sense of panic.  It was like leaping off a cliff.  I closed my eyes and just tried to get it over with.  In the process I was rushing things and abrogating responsibility.  I found I did better when I instead truly focused every ounce of my awareness on the lead, hearing each note and staying in control.
But the real answer is to practice.  If you’ve played that lead a thousand times, when you get up in front of people and the adrenaline is making you erratic, it will still be there for you.

Your Persona
When you’re on stage, you’re the play.  Your clothes are your costume; the script is your songs and comments.  Who do you want to be to people?  What’s your character like?  How do you want people to think of you?  Know who you are up there and what you stand for.